Bahamas

Arrived at Coco beach marina about 3.30am after 24 hours of travelling , just glad to be there. Got an upgrade luckily so was able to sleep in the boot without having to go and wake everybody up. Headed over to Jas’s boat, the aptly named “can’t”. All hands on deck! Really cool boat but still lots of work to do, and Jas and Jim going for it trying to get the boat out of there. Kept the hire car for a few more days and decided to go to the Kennedy Space Centre in the morning. Really amazing place, the Apollo rocket is just massive, stared at it for a long time trying to figure out how anyone could build something like that 40 years ago.
Headed back into town in the evening and began the task of sourcing alcohol for the trip. Every single corner store and liquor shop did a double take when I asked what discount I could get for 70 dozen! One guy did manage to find the supplies required but demanded payment upfront as he was certain I was taking the piss out of him. Next headed to the Walmart (the front wheels struggling to tocuh the ground with the load in the trunk) and loaded the car to breaking point, then topped up with some spirits, did pretty poorly here with only 9 litres of Tequila where as Jas and Liz got about 30 litres each, again the attendants were pretty impressed.

Headed out on a freezing (Yes I know its in Florida but it was f$%kn freezing) morning with a moderate northerly breeze. Captain Can’t had the boat Goosewing for a while and as we went under the first bridge.We all thought we had hit something but it was Randy, one of Jas’s mates from Cocoa throwing waterbombs on the deck, a feat he repeated at the next 3 bridges. Sailed on down the Inter Coastal Waterway looking for Dugongs (Manatees) to run over but never did see any, but did see many dolphins but they’re far to quick to smack into with a sailboat. Went on till dark and nearly made it to the anchorage in Ft Pierce when after a few too many drinks I got confused about our location. Then seeing some channel markers to starboard (wanky sailing term for right side) I turned the boat hard, and the boat came to a pretty sudden stop!. Beached as bro, but luckily Captain Can’t came to the rescue, tied a massive 60 lb anchor to the Halyard and took it back into the channel with the dinghy and winched the boat on its side, luckily it came free 1st go much to my relief. Still managed to earn myself the name Captain Sandbank, guess its better than Cabin Boy Gary.
Next morning we headed out into the open ocean, was a bit rough heading out the channel but once in the open sea the boat stormed along the coast. Really does sail pretty well, had a few sea sickness casualties onboard by the time we headed back into the ICW. Found a really good anchorage by some wildlife refugee and had a BBQ and a few beers on the shore. The Matthews clan really stepped it up a notch, Jason tried to set me on fire by soaking me in Vodka and ficking at match at me. By the time we got back to the boat they weren’t in such good spirits both hurling over the side, the first casualties of the first class one time distilled (obviously) Ronrico Rum.
Made it West Palm and tied up the Can’t next to the “Lost Boys”, Captains Pete, Jacob and James. All of us headed up to Cape Canaveral to watch the Delta 2 rocket launch. Jim kindly rented a car and we all packed into it and headed to Randy's place with a direct view of the launch pad. Was much more impressive to see it live, really took off much quicker than I had imagined, in a few seconds was a speck in the sky. Pretty cool seeing something leave this planet, the mission was the unmanned Kepler probe that is heading into outer space to look for earth like planets. We were hoping to see the shuttle launch as well but it was continuously being put back.

West Palm was a really nice spot, perhaps too nice and the sight of the two vessels definitely attracted attention right from the start. When we really got attention was the night before we left, as we pretty much had to leave after this night. Headed out into town with about ten of us to the local bar, when I saw about ten members of the local gang walk in I decided to head back to the boat with Rich. The boys ended up finding another bar and stayed there until the early morning. Jas had given me the key to the lock for the dinghy , I forgot this and took the Lost boys tender back to the boat. I was awakened at 4am by loud shouts and noise as the lost boys swam the channel out to the boat, they then got the dinghy and went back to the wharf. Somewhere in between the dinghy stalled and they got the idea that it was out of Gas (it wasn’t), the current was about 3 knts and they were rapidly disappearing up the river. Jacob jumped out while some American cage fighter(they had befriended in the bar) in the boat grabbed his foot (you couldn't make this shit up), he did such a good job of this the American was yelling out “Michael phelps” at the top of his lungs , Jacob also shares some other attributes with Michael Phelps but that’s best left unsaid. This show continued as the boys landed naked on Peanut Island and standing naked were met by a security guard who had called the police. With all the noise going on someone had dialed in a domestic abuse case to the police, and Jason and James had to deal with the police on 3 separate call outs and somehow managed to avoid arrest, despite driving at full speed into one of their boats. By the time the sun came up all was well!.
Decided it was best to leave ASAP!. Conditions were not ideal for sailing but the gulf stream was eerily calm and we made it to the Bahamas by the next day. It’s a pretty spectacular sight especially with cloudless skies and no wind. In 4m of water with no sign of land anywhere. Went diving in the afternoon and Jason and James managed to shoot a fish each and escape the attention of a couple of reef sharks, and made for a good game of shark baiting once the fish had been filleted. Jacob also found a random cannon in the middle of nowhere, which was pretty cool, tired to raise it but to anyone with any idea what a cannon weighs this is clearly stupid. Dead calm so anchored out on the banks after we had spotted a large turtle with a spectacular sunset.

Headed to Grand Cay in the morning and tried to check into the Bahamas but the locals were far from interested so we tried to head to double cay but after running aground a few times decided to call it quits and head back to Grand Cay. Unfortunately the only bar in town also had a large fish tank, accessible by jumping over a railing. I say unfortunately because one of us was going in there the moment we walked in that door. Suprisingly It was Jason and Paul who made the move, Jason was eagerly timing the gigantic Crayfish walking round the side as he went over, utter chaos!. The Bahamians were less than impressed and it was the end of our night out in Grand Cay. Went back to the boat and kept up the pace, poor Richity passed out first , so naturally suffered the consequences.

Motored on for a few days catching a few King Mackarel inbetween which made for pretty good eating. Were able to park within a few metres of the beach in Powell Cay, and lit a descent fire and cooked up a crawfish.


Pulled into Green Turtle Cay the next day so the boys could catch their flights the next day. Had a ragging party ging on in the boat until when heading to the bar, someone got a bit excited and launched from the deck into the lost boys 6ft long tender, flipping it and pretty much abandoning all drinking and starting a salvage mission.
Headed for Marsh Harbour the next day, but on the way out Jason discovered steam pouring out of a split pipe in the engine room and the temperature gauge of the scale!. Looked like it might have been a disaster as we sailed back to the harbor but after some investigation Jason managed to clear an airlock and the temp has been cool since. Leaving the wharf we did manage to remove more the few bits of wood with the anchor but no-one was around so it wasn't us Parked up the next Lost Boys and then the anchor , now unattached fell over the bow, didn’t think it was a big deal and went to bed.
Found out in the morning the bottom was about 2-3ft deep in very soft mud and the anchor had vanished leaving no sign on the surface. After 2 unsuccesful salvage attempts Jason managed to find it and pulled it to the surface. Jas did some more repairs that day and right on sunset we were able to clearly see the exhaust trail of the shuttle as it took off into the sunset 140 miles away, that was really cool.
Headed to Marsh Harbour in the morning across what is known as” the Rage “ , “the ripple” might have been a better description. Liz and Jason picked up Paula from the airport meanwhile the lost boys decked themselves out in St Paddy's day attire. I still have no idea what the loincloths were about and most of the old folks sailing into the bay looked rather upset. Paula showed up the party began. Ended up in the bar later on in my Borat thong telling everyone that "St Patrick is most famous st all Kazakstan as he fill a church with many gypsy's and set on fire". Most people loved it apart from a few old fishermen in the corner who didnt know where to look. Headed back to the boat after this , the boys had a disco at the traffic lights and climbed a very tall radio mast. Very clever!


Sailed down to the Elutheran islands, was supposed to have ideal sailing conditions but had to motor the whole way (the wind picking up just as we pulled into Royal Harbour). The boys had caught a big Mahi Mahi and we cooked it in some ruins onshore amongst some fire flies, that was pretty cool.
Headed out to a shipwreck in the morning, had no idea how big it was until we dived under. At least 250ft long and at most in 25ft of water. Especially impressive to see the massive engine sitting alone a few ft below the surface. Jason shot a mackarel and a grouper and was about to head in when they yelled at me from the boat. I was thinking one thing "shark", untied and pulled the motor. Untangled the rope I wrapped round the prop. pulled the motor again , and raced over. Jas pulled this monster of a fish out of the water, and James had another just like it. Big Amberjacks, look just a kingfish but tasted much better.
Headed into Spanish Key as it was a friday night, hoping for a big party.WRONG!. Turns out the island is full with whites who are mostly religious fanatics. We met a cool guy called Wolf who informed us we werent going to be finding any bars and let us use his internet. The weather packed it in for a few days then headed down to Gregory town.
We had heard there was a open mike night in town and the charts did show an anchor symbol. On arrival found there was no sheltered anchorage but anchored off the cliffs and headed to town. Me and Jake went in first, this could have gone badly, when Jacob called the locals bastards (all yanks in here) they said "what did you call me boy", Jake called them bastards again, then put on a southern accent and said "you wanna go boy, thems fighting words, lets go outside", luckily they were good humoured rednecks and all the attention swung once the others arrived.
It would be fair to say most people there , were there to see the band, not 10 drunken antipodeans shredding the dancefloor. TOO BAD. All had a blast and everyone learnt a new dance move. A few off the old ducks on the island took a serious liking to Jacob and Pete but maybe there mullets put the boys off I'm not sure. Headed back to the boat for the bumpiest nights sleep (well awake) i've ever had. Somewhere between the bar and boat two captains managed to steal the local school bus.They couldnt figure out how to turn the lights on so one was hanging out the door with a headlamp (the island is pitch dark) haha. They did return the bus and nobody got arrested.
Headed South to Governers Harbour. A really nice little town with really friendly people. Hung out for a few days and were eagerly expecting the local dance competition. Now it was pretty quiet until we arrived. Things changed quickly. We were all dressed up(like retards), and Paula was soaking wet after falling off the dinghy when getting ashore (no complaints from her,solid effort). People loved us, especially as we were all wearing 3D glasses Jas and Liz "borrowed" from Kennedy Space Centre. There was some Karaoke going on so got into my Borat thong and sang "I'm too sexy". That kicked it up a bit , most of the Bahamian men looked horrified/shocked/disgusted at the same time. Managed to get myself free drinks all night though so that was a score. Then came the dacning compeition. Jacob and his "friend" from Puerto Rico got 3rd place which was both impressive and disturbing. I really do wonder about him sometimes.
Everyone was in pretty sore spirits the next day. But we had the fish fry too look forwards to. Pretty much the biggest event on the island. Everyone turns up and gets into it. Although drunk , even if sober I would have been impressed by the conch Ninja. This guy can cut up a conch and salad but you can't even see it, thats how fast he is. This dude was amazing, got checky and told him I could hack 3 habanero peppers. I was wrong.
Luckily I dropped my prized salad after a few bites much to Jasons amusal. Jas and Pete then got into a few play scraps with the local kids to everyones amusal, nobody got hurt except Jas and Pete. The boys managed to pick up a couple of stowaway Canadians and it was off to bed.
(Read Jason's(http://captaincant.blogspot.com/) shortly for the rest of my blog )